The Topaz Wolf
by timetravellingvampirewithawand
Summary: Edward has left Bella, and Jacob imprints on her. What will happen to her in the dangerous world of werewolves, and what if Edward comes back? Crappy summary. Bad and short for first few chapters c'mon, t'was my first fic but gets better later REVIEW!
1. A short and bad way to start a story

I sat in the kitchen with my arms curled around my knees, feeling the hole threatening to tear open, to rip around the edges, to make itself bigger, even though that was already impossible.

Upon the sound of footsteps, I quickly jumped up and pretended to busy myself by washing the dishes.

"Hey Bells, I was just going to go 'round to the Black's for dinner, I was wondering if you wanted to come?"

Well, I did need a distraction and being down at the Quileute reservation seemed like the perfect thing.

I nodded, knowing that if I were to talk, my charade would slip, and I would snap in front of Charlie.

I had to stop thinking about... I couldn't bear to say his name, even in my head, or I would fall to pieces.

Besides, seeing Jacob, my old friend, was a good idea- after all, being a zombie wasn't much fun.

"Jake, can you pass me the salt?" "JAKE!" Jacob jumped about a foot out of his seat, raising his half of the table, making the salt slide down into Billy's opened hand.

Before Billy had brought him back down to earth, Jacob had been staring at me in the strangest way.

Almost as if... as if he were a blind man seeing the sun for the very first time...


	2. Jake

"Uh, Jake- why were you staring at me?" He was acting very, very strangely. "Staring- what? Sorry, I'm just, uh, really tired, that's all."

It was ten thirty at night, and I was in the Blacks' garage, watching Jake work on his car. It couldn't really be called working, I suppose, because the majority of the time he just sat there and stared, his eyes searching my face hungrily.

"Wow, you're really good at all of this mechanical – stuff, I don't even know what any of the parts are call let alone know their names or where to put them!"

"Sorry, what were you saying?" Oh well, at least my feeble attempts of holding a conversation had gone unnoticed. "Jacob, is everything okay, you look kind of... strange."

Strange was the wrong word to use. Maybe something closer to utterly engrossed and fascinated to a massive extent would be better.

He looked like... like how I felt when I was with- Edward. That was it. The hole in my chest was punched through right again, ripping and tearing in agony. I stumbled, trying to keep myself upright, but apart from that showed no physical reaction to the slaughtering that was happening inside of me.

The pain, however, could not be kept from my eyes, and in half a second, Jacob was at my side, holding me, protecting me from what I could not be protected from.

"It's all right, Bella, I've got you, you're safe, you're all right, I'm with you now..."


	3. Cullen Manor

"Bella, I'll never leave you, you're safe with me, I promise", Jacob crooned to me, stroking my hair like Renee did when I was little. I didn't know how much time had passed; maybe a minute, maybe an hour, but time seemed to stand still as I sobbed into Jacob's warm chest, being comforted like I had needed for a long time.

"I have to go," I whispered, my voice cracking. Not waiting for a response, I grabbed my bag and ran to my truck, tears running down my cheeks. "Wait, Bella, I... Don't go!"

********

I didn't know where I was driving, nor did I care that much. It probably wasn't the safest thing to do, what with the tears clouding my vision and all. Luckily though, the roads had dried after last night's rainfall, and there were no other cars about.

My thoughts were scrambling frantically around my brain, each time I tried to grasp one, it wriggled away. I was so confused. Maybe it was fate, maybe just coincidence, but out of the corner of my eye, I managed to glimpse the turn-off to the Cullen's house. I knew that the hole would be worse tonight, worse than ever before if I went, but I just couldn't stop myself.

The gravel in the driveway crunched beneath my feet as I slowly walked up to the window and peered in. It was eerie, the silence; I half expected Emmett to come pounding down the stairs, or Alice to dance around the kitchen, tidying up pointlessly, but there was nothing. It was a dead house, a ghost house.

I could feel the hole, burning, ripping around the edges, tearing away mercilessly at the threads I had tried to stitch it together with. I curled into a ball, trying desperately to hold myself together, and failed.


	4. I love you

About a week had passed since I had made the mistake of going to the Cullen's house. The threads around the hole in my chest had been weakly sewn together for Charlie, but I knew that reminding myself of anything to do with them would ruin me for once and for all.

Almost every day I spent down at the Black's house- I would be lying to say that I wasn't enjoying myself. Jacob was just so easy to be around; if you didn't count the fact that he took up almost all of the room and ate so much that it was hard to believe it would fit inside him.

Whenever I was with him, close enough to feel his heat radiating out and warming me, like my own personal sun, it felt like another stitch had been put in my wound. The pain had not become less; it was just that now I could handle it: I could bear the pain when I was around Jacob.

I was sitting in the lounge room, chatting about school when, out of the blue, Jacob said something completely surprising. "Bella" He sucked in a deep breath "Bella, I love you". He said it with so much emotion, such transparent honesty that I could tell that he meant it.

I was so astonished that all I could do was gape at him with my mouth open. So many things were going through my head that I was surprised I was capable of thinking through each one. What if Edward came back, would I be able to hurt Jacob enough to go back to him? No, I didn't think I could. Would Edward be angry with Jake for being with me? I didn't know- he said he didn't love me, but I had always secretly hoped...

There was only one thing that I did know for sure. Jacob loved me, and I would not have to try to love him back, it was natural, simple, as easy as breathing to be with him, and I loved him too.


	5. Werewolves

Loving Jacob was so easy, so natural that I didn't have to think about being with him; it was like I was caught in his gravitational pull. The only thing that kept me from his side was Charlie. Still, half of the time I was with Jake, he was down at the reservation too, chatting away with Billy. Both of our dads were fine with us being together, and I could tell that they were glad that I had gotten over Edward.

Even though I would never show it of course, at night time, when Jake wasn't by my side, keeping me warm and safe, sometimes the faintest echo of the hole would etch across my heart.

I was sitting on the couch, absent-mindedly tracing imaginary patterns onto the warm, russet coloured skin of Jacob's hand, when a horrible look crossed his face. It looked as if he was about to be sick. "Jake?" "Jake are you alright?" I asked cautiously. "I'm fine I just..." He didn't finish the sentence, having already run to the bathroom.

I heard Billy call out from the other room "Bells, maybe you should go home, whatever it is that Jake's got, I don't think you want it!" I could hear the sound of retching from the bathroom, and felt inclined to agree. I left a note for Jacob, telling him that I loved him, that he should feel better soon, and that I would be over the second he called me. Then I got in my truck, and drove home.

*******

It had been days now, and I still hadn't heard from Jacob. Every time I called, Billy had told me that he was too sick to ring me back, and that he'd tell me when he was ready to see me again. I was fretting majorly, but something in the back of my mind told me that I should keep my distance. I knew that whatever it was that was wrong with Jacob, it was bad: there was hardly any physical need strong enough to keep him away from me.

About another week had passed, and Jacob had finally come around to my house. He wasn't just tall now, he was MASSIVE. "Jake!" I yelled as he ducked his head to fit through the front door. I ran into his arms and kissed him on the cheek, and it felt as though he had been sitting directly next to a fire for a very long period of time by the temperature of his skin.

He grimaced, a very unusual thing for usually happy Jacob to do in my presence. "Listen, Bella, I have something very, very important to tell you, and you have to take me seriously, do you understand?" There was no joking tone to his voice, no playful light in his eye, so I nodded minutely.

"Okay, well, you remember the stories that I told you, that time down at the beach?" I nodded again, forcing myself not to think about Edward. "They're not myths, they're true- I told you about our descending from wolves, didn't I?" "Jake, where are you going with this?" I demanded. He shook his head, not in disagreement, but as though he was trying to clear it."Well, you see, I haven't been sick, I've been... changing." "How?" I asked, and then he had told me the truth about werewolves.


	6. Presents and explosions

It didn't matter to me. Werewolf of not, he was still my Jacob, and there was no way that I would love him any less. For a long moment, we simply stared into each other's eyes, and then, the next thing I knew, it was morning, and I was asleep in my bedroom, with Jacob nowhere to be seen.

Was there something wrong with me? Why was I so drawn to mythical beings? Oh well, probably just another dimension to my danger magnet side. I loved Jacob, and that was all that mattered for the moment.

I sleepily tumbled out of bed, and in doing so, my foot caught on the nail of one of my floorboards. I cursed under my breath, and checked the damage. There was a small, shallow cut where I had snagged my foot on the nail, but that wasn't what I was so surprised about. The floorboard had lifted up, revealing a small area full of objects- objects that I recognised immediately as my birthday presents from the Cullens.

It will be as if I never existed. That's what Edward had said to me. And yet, here was proof that Edward was real, not just in my mind. I thought that the pain of the hole ripping was bad all of the other times. I was wrong. I would take that any day in place of the pain I was feeling then.

I was on my bedroom floor, feeling my heart tear in agony so painful I wondered if even Jacob, my dear Jacob could attempt to stitch it back together.

Then suddenly I heard the doorknob turn. How odd: Charlie wasn't meant to come home for another two or three hours. It must be Jacob. Oh, God, how was I meant to pull myself back together in time? I had only just picked myself off the floor and managed to sit down on my bed before Jake came in.

Traitor tears were rolling down my face, ruining my charade that everything was normal. "Bella?" "Bella, what's wrong?! What happened?" I didn't have enough strength left to give a proper explanation, so I merely uttered one word to him. "Edward..."

Suddenly Jacob was shaking violently, so violently I thought he was going to explode. And then there was a tearing sound, and in the place where Jacob Black once stood, was a giant, russet coloured wolf staring straight at me.


	7. Hospitals and horsesized wolves

(A/N: Okay, yes, as I'm sure you can tell, there is a MAJOR PLOT TWIST in store, and I hope you like it. Please review, as I'd love to know what you think)

**Suddenly Jacob was shaking violently, so violently I thought he was going to explode. And then there was a tearing sound, and in the place where Jacob Black once stood, was a giant, russet coloured wolf staring straight at me.**

**______________________________________________________________________**

"Jacob," I whispered shakily. "Jake, honey, calm down," The wolf, I couldn't bring myself to believe it was Jacob, showed no response except a long, breathless snarl. "Listen, I know you're in there Jake, please, calm down, for me?" I pleaded. But though I tried to convince myself he was in there, I could see no trace of humanity in the large yellow eyes- This wasn't Jacob Black, it was an animal.

So quickly I could barely see it, he lunged forward towards me, and I was suddenly on the floor. There was a sudden stab of pain in my throat, I was only vaguely aware of a high-pitched yelp sounding close to my ear and I succumbed to the darkness around the edges of my eyes, letting it pull me under, deeper and deeper...

The first thing that I noticed was an annoying, high pitched beeping somewhere to my right. Was I dead? No, I doubted that, there was far too much pain in my neck and left side of my body for that. Hmm, that beeping was getting very annoying. Why couldn't it stop? Eventually I found my eyelids, and slowly peeled them back over my eyes. I was in what seemed to be a relatively shabby hospital ward, with a piece of machinery monitoring my heartbeat.

So _t__hat_ was the source of the beeping then. I looked down at the end of the bed, and something was not right. I couldn't stretch out fully; why would they have made it so small? After a long second, I realised. The bed wasn't too small, _I_ was too _big._ Pulling the tubes out of my nose and arm, and avoiding my left side, I stood up next to the side of the bed.

_Holy Crap!_ I was tall!! My eyes swept the room, but there were no people to be seen. _Well_, I decided, _I guess I don't have to stay in here_. Grabbing a pair of crutches, I stumbled my way down the corridor, until I found what I wanted. Inside one of the bathrooms was a mirror. I held my breath and stepped towards it. Nothing could have prepared me for what I saw in there. The left side of my neck, and the left of the rest of my body for that matter, was hideous.

I traced my fingers down the long, deeply cut scratches along my arm. They looked like damage done by claws. Claws. Wolves. Jacob. I couldn't stop the memories from pouring into my brain. Jacob, my dearest Jacob had done this. He didn't mean it, he wasn't in control of himself, Oh God, Jake did this to me!

He would be in more pain than I was! Jake loved me so much more than I could imagine, imagine the guilt he would feel for this. I cursed Edward under my breath. If it weren't for him leaving those stupid presents there in the first place, I wouldn't look like this, wouldn't be feeling this pain, and neither would Jake. Suddenly anger, white hot flashed through me. I looked down at my hands, only to notice that my whole frame was shaking violently. I gritted my teeth, and then the fire inside me felt like it was bursting through my chest, and there was a ripping sound.

I looked down, and froze for a second. Because instead of seeing my bare feet and the bottom of the hospital nightgown, I saw two furry, golden paws. Was there another wolf in here, one of Jacob's Quileute friends? My head snapped up to the mirror. But the reflection of an eighteen year-old girl with brown hair was missing, and in its place was a large topaz coloured wolf. I blinked, and it did too. "Who are you?" I tried to whisper, but it came out a low bark. Then it all fell into place. The golden coated wolf was me. I was a werewolf.


	8. It's In our blood

_WHAT?!?!? _I was no expert on werewolves obviously, but from what I had picked up, only the descendants from Levi Uley and Ephriam Black could turn into wolves. Keeping my head, I thought back to the night that Jacob had explained werewolves to me

"_So you see," he concluded, "It's in our blood, and we'll keep passing it on through generation to generation"._

I had always assumed that the werewolf thing was genetic, but obviously that couldn't be it. Anybody could see that I had Charlie's eyes, and almost all of Renee's features. Then something occurred to me: _"It's in our blood"_

When Jacob attacked me, I had been cut. But he had yelped- suggesting that maybe he had cut himself at the same time. Was it possible that he got his blood into my wound?

I slumped down onto the floor, twitching my tail nervously. It was only then that I realised that I was not alone with my thoughts

_BELLA??!? What? How? Impossible! Can't be! What on earth?!_

Over the babble of voices (or thoughts, I suppose) I heard a strange, two toned command ring out.

_QUIET!_

From what I had heard, this had to be Sam, the Alpha. Suddenly everybody fell silent.

_Bella?_ _Will you explain to me what happened?_ Sam asked, speaking each syllable slowly, like you would to a child, or a mentally handicapped person. _I... I, don't know. Jake attacked me and then I woke up in hospital and then I got angry and now... I'm a werewolf too. _

_But that's impossible!_ Sam yelled. _Is this some sort of joke, Bella, because I can't see the funny side!!!_ A low snarl rose up my throat, and ripped out through my clenched teeth. _This isn't a joke, Sam; do you honestly think I would do this?! Even if I wanted to, HOW?!? I know I sure didn't choose this, so you could please try and be a little more UNDERSTANDING! _

I was on my feet now, my hackles bristling.

_Okay, I'm sorry, that was uncalled for, but how..? _Sam said, trailing off at the end. _I don't know Sam, _I said, _but I do know that most people will be pretty damn scared when they see a giant wolf running 'round the hospital. I'm going to have to find a way out without being caught._

_*******_

I walked back a few paces, nearly knocking over a lot of expensive, important looking hospital machinery in doing so. Easily, I leaped through the open window, and landed quietly on the grass outside the hospital. Shaking my coat out, I loped over to hide behind a rosebush.

_Bella, _Sam said cautiously, _we're going to phase out now. Why? _I asked. I didn't want to be left alone. Then I felt the Silent shimmer of their transformation, as well as one more half a second later. That was when I heard a voice that I would have responded to anywhere. _Bella? _Jacob whispered.


	9. Flashback

Jacobs POV

_Bella?_ I whispered cautiously, half expecting her to run, or to attack me. She should have. I didn't deserve to live. I had nearly killed her- I wanted to kill myself. I shuddered, thinking back to that terrible night.

*******

I opened the door to the Swan's house, tiptoeing in through the hallway. Then I froze. I could hear soft sobs coming from somewhere upstairs. Was Bella hurt?

My hands clenched into fists at my side, crushing the bouquet of wildflowers I had picked for her.

Running upstairs with inhuman speed, my sensitive ears picked up the terrible noise. It sounded as though somebody was tearing her soul in half.

Slowly, I turned the doorknob, and there was Bella, my precious Bella, lying on the floor, surrounded by several objects reeking with vampire scent.

"Bella?" "Bella, what's wrong?!" "What happened?" I managed to choke out, even though I knew inside what the answer was.

She seemed to be beyond telling me anything much, but she faintly whispered"...Edward"

Edward. Edward, the filthy bloodsucker had done this. Hurt my Bella in a way that should have been illegal. I would kill him. I would search the entire world until I found him and ripped him into pieces for what he had done.

My body started trembling violently, and red flashed in front of my eyes. I mashed my teeth together, and clenched my fists, trying to stop the tremors rippling through my body.

There was no way that I would lose control. I would not hurt Bella, I would hurt her like that disgusting leech. Not a chance. But then...

Then the red engulfed me. There was nothing but red. I couldn't see what I was doing. Couldn't feel. Couldn't think. My mind was gone, my wolf instincts taking over.

And I was one angry wolf.


	10. Flashback cont

**Still Jacob's POV**

The next thing I remembered, I was standing there in Bella's bedroom, my muzzle and paws covered in blood. I looked down and howled one long note, for there, lying on the floor was Bella- surrounded in a pool of her own blood with deep gashes down the left side of her body.

Realisation soon hit me. I had attacked Bella. Killed her myself. I was worse than the leech. At least he hadn't physically hurt her. I was a monster, a murderer...

Pacing the room in a panic trying desperately to think, a small movement out of the corner of my eye caught my attention. It was Bella. Breathing. Skidding to her side, I placed one oversized paw on her wrist- checking her pulse. It was weak, almost impossible to feel, but it was definitely there.

She was alive, but only just. I shut my eyes, trying to calm down enough to phase, but I had no such luck. I was going to have to do this wolf.

Carefully, I caught her shirt in my teeth, and hauled her onto my back. Pushing the door open further, I ran down the stairs and out of the house into the morning light of the rising sun.

Without realising it, I found myself running in the direction of the Quileute reservation. Then I remembered why- even when Bella was in danger, I didn't want her being treated by a parasite.

Finally, I reached the hospital and was presented with the challenge of getting her in. Obviously, I couldn't just walk in as a wolf with a bleeding girl on my back. Looking around, I carefully placed her on the front step of the entrance and rammed into the door.

Perfect; even the less sensitive ears of the humans inside would be alarmed by the racket I had just made. Stepping behind the row of rosebushes next to a window, I closely watched the entrance.

After only a few seconds, an elderly nurse stepped outside and gasped at the sight of Bella's limp body. She called something to the people inside, and three other nurses helped lift Bella onto a stretcher and inside the hospital.

I was finished here- there were things that had to be done.


	11. Flashback stilll continued

I walked through the streets of Forks until I reached the police station, somebody was going to have to break the tragic news to Charlie. Along the way, I rehearsed my excuse again and again, making sure that I would get it right:

It wasn't exactly like I could stroll up and say, "Look Charlie, I'm really sorry, but when I saw your daughter crying over her vampire ex-boyfriend and turned into a wolf- wait, did I forget to say that I'm a werewolf? Right, well anyway, I lost control, attacked her, and now she's on the verge of death and it's my fault. I guess I'll see you later!"

After about four minutes of cowardly waiting outside, I walked into the police station and almost immediately tripped into Charlie, who was carrying a box of take-away coffees and donuts.

My face must have conveyed at least a tiny bit of what I was feeling inside, because upon seeing my expression, Charlie stopped dead in his tracks, spilling coffee and donuts all over the front of his shirt and the recently mopped floor.

"It's Bella, isn't it?" he whispered. My throat felt tight, and I wasn't sure if I would be able to answer properly, so I merely nodded my head. Not needing any explanations, Charlie balled his fists and growled at me to get in the cruiser.

I slammed the door behind me, and turned to face Charlie. "Bella and I, we were walking in the woods and this bear- I think we got between her and her cub, but she attacked Bella and I... I don't know if she's going to make it..." I choked out.

My voice sounded thick and strained, and it was only then that I realised that I was crying. Before I could stop myself, the tears turned into full-fledged sobs, and I was struggling to breathe in between the waves of despair and grief I was feeling.

Charlie looked like he was about to follow suit, but he put on a brave face and aside from my choking sobs, we sat in silence all the way to the hospital.

I didn't remember how I got there, but suddenly we were in the ward where Bella lay, lifeless and broken on a hospital bed with tubes feeding into her nose and arms. The entire left side of her body, especially her neck was covered in long deep gashes, the raking cuts made by _my_ claws.

A middle aged nurse came in holding a clipboard with a sympathetic look on her face. I knew what she was going to say before she said it. The words she said ended up sounding fuzzy and distant, but I could read her lips, which seemed to be taking up all of my vision.

"I'm so sorry dear, but she's not going to make it..."

Then everything swirled around me and turned black.


	12. Miracle

When I regained consciousness sometime later, I opened my eyes. I wasn't sure where I was, but it looked a lot like the waiting room of the hospital, and then I remembered why I was there; I had killed Bella.

Oh, If only I could have hit my head on the way down and gotten brain damage! If only I could forget, be completely, totally blissfully ignorant of what I had done, what I had committed- murder. I stood up from where I had been sitting - probably by Charlie, or a nurse - and stumbled back as the full force of what I had done to Bella - my poor Bella - hit me like a ton of bricks.

But somehow, even though I had seen her limp, broken body with my own eyes, I did not believe in my heart that she was truly gone. _Stop pretending Jacob,_ I hissed to myself. _She's gone, because of you, you're the reason she's dead _I thought.

I felt a slight tug in my chest pulling me to something down one of the corridors. Curious, I looked down, but my shirt hadn't caught on to anything- no, this was _inside_ me. It felt like the connection that pulled me toward Bella, but that was ridiculous. It was probably just my subconscious trying to get me out of the hospital, or maybe even to glance at her cold, lifeless body for one last time before the... the funeral.

It took me a few seconds to realize that I was following the tug, walking towards whatever it was that I was mysteriously drawn to. Not even knowing where I was going, I squeezed my eyes shut and walked zombie style down the eerily quiet hallways of the Quileute hospital, my noisy footsteps echoing around the walls.

When my hands touched the metal of a doorknob, I knew where I was being drawn to from the beautiful scent that seeped out under the crack in the door- Bella's room. I tried to breathe in, but noticed that I was crying, and I chocked on the air.

The door creaked open, and I saw who was there. Or, I guess I should say- who _wasn't _there. The window swung open and closed, just like they do in cartoons when somebody has run away and I knew that Bella had escaped somehow. I could also tell, from the musky, woodsy scent mingled with her blood, that she had not done it human.

The mystery that presented to me held only a small part of my attention. Bella was alive, and that was all that mattered for now. I exploded out of my clothes without even thinking about it, and sauntered out the window, cushioning the impact with my large soft paws.

Behind a row of rosebushes, I could see the behind of a large golden wolf- Bella. It was her, she was alive- but that didn't mean that I had done nothing- I had still attacked her, still nearly killed her and there was no way of knowing whether or not she would forgive me. She shouldn't. I was still very seriously considering the option of jumping off a cliff, or throwing myself under a truck so that I could stop causing the people I loved pain.

It probably wouldn't have done much though, so I stepped up behind her and whispered cautiously- _Bella?_ I asked. Her chocolate brown eyes met mine, and she loped towards me. I braced myself, ready, and fairly willing, for her to rightfully attack me, but instead felt something warm against my furry cheek. I opened my squinted eyes, and was surprised to see Bella, nuzzling me like there was no tomorrow, and knew that she had, by some miracle, forgiven me.


	13. Faster than somebody!

**(A/N: Geez guys, I'm sorry I haven't updated in so long- I don't deserve your reviews. I think I must have imprinted on Fanfiction, because I was playing piano and all of a sudden I just had this strange urge to go to the computer and write for all of you wonderfully amazing people. Maybe I just imprinted on all of you. I'm not entirely sure how to incorporate all of my Fanfic friends into my stories, so I'm just dedicating chapters to people. This particular chapter is dedicated to the "two sweet little girls wanting to see what happens next" (yue). Don't be angry if it's not dedicated to you, all in good time. Oh, and "Ashley", your favourite bloodsucking vamps will come in soon...)**

_Bella POV_

I saw his face first- So filled with emotion, even in animal form. His eyes were brimming with guilt, concern, pain, but what with one thing that made me feel a little better- _hope_. Poor Jacob, he looked so upset and helpless; tail between his legs and head drooped low, but at least he knew I was alive.

He seemed to be getting closer, but I noticed that I was running towards him. Flinching, Jacob braced himself, almost as though he thought I was about to attack him: how ridiculous. I was so happy to see him, so blissfully overjoyed by his presence that I did what felt most natural. I just let my wolf instincts wash over me, and revelled in his presence for a minute or two, showing my forgiveness and love in the way this body felt right.

Too soon, however, he pulled back, and looked at me with eyes full of guilt. _Bella, I know you've forgiven me, God knows why, but I want you to know that I would rather die than let anything happen to you, let alone do something like what I've done to you. I-I just don't know how to say it, but I'm so sorry, I'm, I love you and-_ He tripped over his words, even in his head. I didn't want to waste any time with this sort of talk.

_Jake, _I told him sternly, _I can tell you're sorry- this whole pack mind thing makes that pretty obvious. Now, if you truly love me, you'll stop apologizing, because that's not going to make anything better. Okay??_ I scolded him, feeling a lot like I was training a pet. He nodded meekly, but his head was filled with remorse for what he had done.

_Uh, Bells, do you think you can phase out, Charlie's pretty worried about you and I don't think that seeing you as a wolf would really help..._ he trailed off, but I could see what he was saying- I had to show Charlie that I was okay. Human.

I shut my eyes, and thought about being in my human form. I relived calming memories of Jake and I in my head, and tried to turn my body into its original shape. When I opened my eyes though, I could still see my paws topaz fur catching the sunlight, and sighed in disappointment. Trying to help me, Jacob remembered all of the times he had transformed back into a human. I concentrated deeply on the silent shimmer of change, but it just wasn't working.

_Right, well, wanna kill some time while we wait for my body to work?_ I asked Jacob jokingly. He just nodded his head, and in my mind I saw a quiet, secluded place in the woods that he was about to take me to. After looking at it in Jake's mind, I automatically knew the direction in which to walk. But I didn't want to walk. I wanted to _run._ _Jake, race you?_ I asked, filled with giddy excitement.

I knew it was kind of childish, but being a wolf was ridiculously cool, and I wanted to try out my new strong legs until I could phase back. I rocketed forward, in the direction of the forest, stretching my muscles in long, rolling motions. It felt so good to just let go to my animal instincts, to watch the bushes, paths and houses fly behind me.

I was so caught up in my thoughts that I didn't realise until I reached the clearing in the forest that Jake wasn't with me. Even though I couldn't see him, I could hear Jake's thoughts, and barked a low laugh. _How can she do that? She's faster than Leah for god's sake! _I could see through his eyes the forest whisk behind him, and feel his muscles burning, the breath pumping through his lungs. _Finally! _I thought to myself with glee. _I'm faster than somebody!!!!_

I lay down, puffing and panting waiting for Jacob to catch up with me. It took about a minute or two, but he got there eventually, and lay down next to me, his chin resting on my neck. He sighed a low, contented rumble in the back of his throat; if he was a cat, he'd be purring.

His thoughts weren't worded- simple, wordless emotions were running through his head. Happiness, joy, relief, calmness and tiredness- he hadn't slept for days. I sighed contentedly, and shut my eyes, knowing that I would be able to phase back eventually. Hopefully.


	14. Dog bowls and ripped couches

**(A/N: yeesh, haven't updated in AGES! I'm so sorry, I'm such a slow updater lol I'd be surprised if anybody's actually reading my stories anymore... i know it's short- i'm just incredibly lazy******** anyway, lizzybtm- THIS IS WHEN IT GETS HAPPY! (for the most part, anyway- something obviously has to happen at the end!) I decided to make a semi-funny (to me, anyway) chapter just to lighten the mood a bit! Nothing emo going on here guys... *shudders* anywho, enjoy, my lovelies!)**

The next couple of days passed somewhat uneventfully- Sam had phoned Charlie telling him that I had been moved to a hospital in Alaska where he would not be able to visit me and I had spent literally hours concentrating, but no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't morph back into a human. I had been staying at Jacob's house, on the condition that Billy wouldn't mention anything to Charlie, and I would be warned if he was coming around to visit.

We had discovered the second that Jacob phased back to normal to explain the situation to Billy that our minds were more closely linked than the other members of the pack- after all, he _had_ imprinted on me. Whenever he was in human form he could still hear my thoughts- not all of them though, only the ones that I wanted him to hear. It was sort of like talking, only more frustrating- I couldn't "_talk"_ to anybody but him.

I sat on the porch of the Black's home, waiting impatiently for Jake to come outside- Billy had a strict "No pets in the house" rule which I grudgingly followed. I supposed he had a point though- I was so big that I couldn't move around without breaking anything.

My stomach rumbled, and I growled under my breath. If Jake didn't come out of that door in under ten seconds, I was going to run in there and drag him out myself. Finally he opened the flimsy screen door, a smirk on his face and a red object in his hand.

I snarled under my breath; a string of profanities about Jacob, and his grin became even wider. _I hate you_ I thought, narrowing my eyes- growling a little and baring my teeth while he laughed. _This is SO ridiculous. Just give me some _normal_ food Jacob, or so help me..._ I thought, while he set the dog bowl down in front of me.

And yes, I did say _dog bowl._ After hours of argument, Billy, Jacob and the rest of the pack had come to the conclusion that I should eat kibble since I refused to hunt wild animals and eat them raw- (that was just so, so _gross)_, and I had already had enough normal human food that I would get sick if I ate too much more of it.

Even though their argument sort of made sense, I reckoned it was just so that they could have a laugh at my expense - For a werewolf, Jacob sure was making a hypocritically large amount of dog jokes directed at me.

In this particular case, our odd little form of communication proved to be useful- Jacob could hear absolutely every name I called him, including the new ones I invented exclusively for him. If there's anything that strips away your dignity more than eating dog food out of a bowl, I'd like to hear about it.

Then Jacob did something that surprised me- he pulled his shirt up over his head, and flashed a brief grin, before a huge, russett coloured wolf stood in his place- the shredded remains of his tracksuit pants in tatters around his paws.

Wordlessly- or should I say thoughtlessly, he trotted over next to me, and started scooping up mouthfuls of the dog food, before turning and smiling a big, wolfy grin: his tongue hanging out the side of his mouth. Playfully, I nudged his cheek with my snout and turned to follow suit, crunching up the surprisingly-ok-tasting food.

It was getting dark now, and I was already feeling a bit tired, so I walked away from Jacob to the old ripped couch sitting in the backyard that was placed there for me to sleep on and launched myself onto it. Now that I was a werewolf, I finally understood why dogs circled around a spot before lying down- not to was just so... wrong, I guess.

I lay down and wrapped my tail around my body, exhaling loudly- the couch was extremely comfortable. I felt some motion beside me and looked to see a flash of brown as Jake lay down next to me. I smiled, not even caring that Jacob could hear every thought in my head about how glad I was that he was next to me. What did it matter if he knew how hopelessly attached I was to him? I closed my eyes, and remembered the day- showing him exactly how annoying he could be when he was teasing me, and how I secretly loved fighting with him- our little pointless arguments that offended nobody, and let him know how happy he made me feel- how complete and alive I was when he was around.

_Love you Jake. Love you too, Bella._

And then I drifted off to sleep.

****************

As it turns out, there is an upside to having an inability to return to human form- It's impossible to sleeptalk! Pleased with myself, I jumped off the couch and stretched out my limbs to take out all of the kinks in my muscles. Looking in through the window, I realised it was around ten o'clock in the morning- Billy and Jacob would both be up around now.

A flapping sort of noise came from behind the garage, and I saw Jake shaking his whole body- fur and water droplets flying everywhere. _Watch out- Billy's got the house and he apparently doesn't like it when you bark in his ear _he laughed, a big, dopey grin on his face.

_Wow Jake- I didn't know that animals thought stuff like this as well but- you smell like wet dog!_ I said, wrinkling my nose as the breeze blew his scent toward me. He barked a gruff chuckle, and shook once again- this time getting me wet with the water flying off his dripping coat.

_You are SO dead, _I warned him, and began to chase him around the huge backyard, snapping playfully at his heels before he sped back up again to get out of my way. We ended up in a heap, puffing and panting- if I were human, my cheeks would be flushed with the exercise. "Well, well, well," said Billy, wheeling his way into view. "I'll have to put an ad in the paper- looks like we'll have some puppies on our hands soon!"

I couldn't blush, obviously, but my head drooped in embarrassment, and my tail sagged a little bit. Billy just sat there, laughing like a maniac, and Jake barked once indignantly and nudged his father's wheelchair- making him roll down the slight hill and come to a slow halt near some bushes.

I ran into the garage- trying desperately to phase so that I wouldn't have to hang around with Billy making suggestive jokes 24/7. I shut my eyes and tried to force my body into the silent shimmer of transformation, and was surprised and delighted when I felt warmth ripple through my body- filling me up. This was it! The fire was spreading through my chest, hotter and hotter- all of this happening in the space of about half a second. Then all of a sudden everything went cold and my body froze. I wasn't entirely wolf but I knew that I hadn't made it back to human yet. Something was very, _very _wrong.


	15. Complications

**(A/N: I'm eating a peppermint crisp right now, so I have to give all of the credit to the minty-flavoured goodness that's inside these things. What's it even made out of anyway? If you know please pm, I'm intrigued. Anywho, sorry if it's sucky but at least I've updated! (i'm the laziest person on the planet in case you didn't realise...) sorry I'll stop chattering and get on with the story- this chapter in Jakey-wakey's p.o.v! Wohoo Jacob! (my one, anyway))**

I grinned to myself- Bella was even more fun to be around with her newly acquired werewolf temper, and I was just about to creep up behind her when I froze dead in my tracks.

Instead of seeing her shiny golden coat, or even her chocolate brown hair, I saw Bella lying on the floor- her entire body distorted and warped. It was sickening to see- her body looked more lupine than human, but her topaz fur was missing in large patches, revealing bits of pale human skin. Her paws had fingers, her mouth; halfway between a muzzle and lips, was filled with huge teeth that dug into her gums. Her features were gruesomely stuck in the middle, and she looked like something from a well-made horror movie with a genius as the special-effects guy.

Trying my best not to freak out entirely, I approached her cautiously. "Bella? Bells..." and jumped back when her head snapped in my direction. Underneath the high keening noise that I now realised was her whimpering, there was a snuffling noise as she sniffed the air. "Bella, honey, it's okay, I'm not going to hurt you," I said, my palms facing her so she knew I meant no harm. Her deformed ears pressed against her skull, and she stared at me with cold, empty eyes. The emptiness in those eyes frightened me, and I repressed a shudder before attempting again to approach her again.

I stepped closer again, unconsciously shushing and murmuring that it was okay- as if. Assuming what appeared to be an attempt at an aggressive position; Bella tried standing up on her grossly deformed legs, before sliding back down pitifully, growling and baring her teeth. I realised that I wasn't going to do her any good by just standing around watching her, so I ran into the house and started yelling Billy's name in between ragged breaths.

"What? What is it?!?" he called back, panicked.

"It's Bella," -deep breath- "in the" -pant- "garage- NOW!!!"

He wheeled himself out the door at a surprising pace for an old man in a wheelchair and entered the garage. Putting his hand over his mouth, he just stared, not blinking as Bella writhed and growled on the ground before him.

"I- I gotta go get help, Jake!" Billy gasped. I shook my head slowly, not really in agreement or disagreement- he would be ridiculously slow, but if he stayed and watched Bella, he might get attacked. I decided that his chances of getting hurt were far bigger staying in the garage, so I finally nodded. He rolled out the door, probably going to get advice from Old Quil or something.

I slumped down onto the ground, knocking over a shovel which, in turn, pushed over a motorbike, causing Bella to flinch and moan a horrible noise that was both human and wolf. How could this possibly be happening? After how good things were starting to look for us, how could this happen?

I placed my head on my knees and started rocking back and forth for I don't know how long- all could tell was that it had gotten darker outside and I couldn't feel my legs any more. So slowly I almost didn't notice it, Bella's continuous growl (how she drew breath I don't even know) began sounding more and more human, until finally she started sobbing, sounding almost like herself.

I shuffled over to her, still wary in case she decided to attack me. "Bella?" I croaked, my voice hoarse and sore. Bella leaned against me, her hideous body pressing down on mine. I swallowed my desire to retch, and put my arm around what looked like her shoulder. "It's so, so cold, Jake," She whispered, sobbing into my shirt. "I'm so cold. Can't you make it go away?"

Things dropped off my cheek and fell down onto her head, and I realised that they were my tears. "Shhhh, Bella, honey, It's okay, it's alright, everything will be just fine, I'll make it go away, I'll make it go away..." I cooed, stroking her hair/fur without even shuddering. After all, this was Bella, my Bella, no matter what she looked like, that's who she would always be. With one final shudder, her eyes slid shut and she became silent.

I just rocked her back and forth and rubbed circles on her shoulder, sobbing.

********

The rest of the night continued like that, Bella either looking like she was about to attack me- growling and baring her teeth, or crying her heart out and screaming/sobbing about the coldness. I had no idea what to do- I was way out of my depth.

I only left her side once the entire night, to get some food for both me and her, and to go to the toilet. I left a bowl of water next to her and lay a blanket over her when she wasn't completely animalistic. After a while it seemed that she calmed down and saw me as a human when she was talking, but when she was overcome by her animal instincts, my scent as a wolf seemed to stop her from growling or trying to stand up and fight, which looked incredibly painful and difficult on her horribly deformed limbs.

Morning came, and there was still no sign of Billy. I was beginning to worry- well, not really beginning, seeing as I had spent the whole night next to my girlfriend who was stuck in between a human and a wolf- I had already worried a fair bit.

I morphed back into a human as Bella's growls turned into sobs, and then froze as the barest hint of a scent reached my nostrils. It was impossible. Absolutely impossible- it couldn't be. But it was- there was no denying the sickly sweet smell wafting in from outside... Vampires?!?


End file.
